Marital Rape

I was touched and knocked on the floor
There is no place where i could go for justice
Because there is no door
I have suffered the same pain as other rape victims
But my wedding, is the problem
The only thing I can get in the name of justice is Divorce
because they think it’s the remedy of the pain
The justice I deserve
I still ask myself where was I mistaken and where did I go wrong
The only people I thought who would understand were other women
but its something they have been through too
You know what is weird? These men have made them believe that its not a crime
Its a husband’s right
From the day of marriage everything a women posses becomes the husband’s property: Her body, her dreams, her aspirations, her choices……. this list is never ending
They have made them believe this too
I pity them because unlike me they don’t realise that they have been wronged
they endure this thinking that its okay, “because marriage requires compromises” Is what they have been taught
A right that these men get over our bodies right from the day of our marriage
Because to them marriage is a contract for irrevocable sex
And consent?
What’s that? It’s just something you have in fairytales
(Sadly we didn’t get it there either)

They say its not rape,
because once you’re married there’s no reason to say NO
They also say it cannot be criminalised
as it would be tough to establish the existence of consent.
Ever thought who they are?
They are just some men who are lead by patriarchy
who fail to understand the difference between women and objects.
Do not judge their qualifications, they include the illiterate ones and the highly qualified ones too because while procuring the knowledge over the most complex issues, they failed to learn the basic concept of equality and respect.
They say a wife will be safe because her safety is of primary importance to her husband, isn’t this what all the religions include in their wedding vows,
but who will save them if the saviour itself is the monster?

Dear Kings of Patriarchal Castles,
The next time you look at your wife make sure you remember this!

  1. Marriage is an institution not an arrangement
  2. Marriage is not a permit for you to sexually abuse her
  3. Marriage is not a contract and she is not a consideration
    Marriage is everything you both mutually decide it to be and not your arbitrary decisions

Marriage is an institution based on the pillar of love, understanding and trust but the foundation, it is the promise to stay together and support each other in every odd, every problem and adversity everyday for the rest of the life.
It means to protect each other and not hurt each other!
It means to adjust at times for other person’s happiness but that does mean to sacrifice your dignity and personal autonomy!

-Marital Rape Right!

Advertisements

Women’s Day!

Why do we need to respect women?
Housewives or the working ones?
Even if they work they do it for themselves so what is so great about it?
Why do they have special women’s day and week?

Dear Society,
If there are any such questions in your mind, let me tell you that now
Women aren’t demanding anything special just some basic rights
Rights that include
The Right over her own body
The Right of having a consent
The Right of being free of public scrutiny for crimes she hasn’t committed
The Right of moving on from her past
The Right of keeping herself above anyone else
The Right for taking her own decisions
The Right to not carrying other people’s guilt
The Right of not having to always make tough choices
The Right to prove her worth after being born and not being sentenced to death in the womb
The Right of having their hard-work being paid in terms of productivity and not gender
The Right of
.
.
.
Is it too much to ask for?

We need to put a stop at such activities
We need to think of women as adult human beings capable of having the authority to take their decisions
We need to stop thinking that a married women loses her right of Saying No to sexual intercourse to her Husband
We need to stop assuming that if a women was raped it was her fault
We need to stop asking women to lower her voices in her life discussions
We need to stop blaming women for the misdeeds of her children
We need to stop
.
.
.
.
We need to start making letting them take control of their own lives

And then we might not need such days or weeks because they could have the 365 days of a year celebrating all that they want!

 

 

 

 

Dear Housewife

To the dear lady who is always portrayed to be the one sitting in front of a TV set and being jobless

I am sorry,
that people don’t respect what you do
that your kids ask you the question of what have you done?
That you aren’t their hero and they constantly compare you to their father
They fail to understand your resilience and call you weak
That it took years for people to realise that you are the house maker
That the only place they talk about you is tv series where they show you as a person whose only stress is the perfect pie you cook and the colour of the tablecloth
That even after knowing the kind of hard work you do, you are always portrayed as a lady with pitch-perfect makeup
.
.
.

let me tell you, that you are way more than what they show you to be
And
Don’t compare yourself to the working women who play your roles on tv, you don’t need to worry about sheets, laundry and your looks

BUT

There are always exceptions, aren’t there?
The ones who know your importance
The ones who treat you well
The ones who don’t expect you to be a superhuman
and the ones who accept you as who you are
And this women’s day Let’s not just talk about the women but also the men who understand women in the time of need
Who celebrate Women’s Day every day

– A party is nothing without the special ones

 

 

 

 

Anger or PMS?

Hey girl why so angry? are you menstruating?

Dear world,
I am a women and I get angry because like you I have the right to!
1.I am angry because I am a victim of public scrutiny
2. I am angry because my pay is not based on my working abilities but my gender
3. I am angry because I am tired of living upto everybody’s expectations
4. I am angry because I am forced to make sacrifices and make them look like I was made for them
5. I am angry because people judge me more for what I wear than what I am
6. I am angry because I am tired of customising myself according to the needs of people
7. I am angry because I am blamed for everything that goes wrong in the society
8. I am angry because people cant differentiate between me and any other object
9. I am angry because even before I am born people think that I am going to be a hapless and killed in the womb
10. I am angry because I am not allowed to answer questions that are reffered to me
.
.
.
.
.
999 I am angry because people mistake my anger a human emotion for PMS (Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) refers to physical and emotional symptoms that occur in the one to two weeks before a woman’s period)


– Dont mistake my anger for PMS

Bad Liar/Reputation?​

She is real rude
She is humorous humiliating
She is unique fake
She is loved spoilt
She is a self loving self- centered person
She smokes, drinks and parties like you and others is a slut and a brat
She is hard working lucky
She does not justify when we confront her, because she knows you won’t trust her she is guilty

Is everything that glitters is gold ? .
Not everyone with a bad reputation is actually bad.
So you still think she is really nasty, aloof, antagonistic, callous, rude ? .

-People with bad reputations have the best stories to tell

Ignore all hatred and criticism
Live for what you create
and Die protecting it
-Lady Gaga

Men

Dear society,

A man is “a male human being ”
so what makes you feel that a man is the one who is strong, does not feel pain, needs to be macho, who leads, a person who fights for women, opens the door, slides a chair, earns more, needs to be aggressive, does not wear pink, cannot be vulnerable, empathetic, sensitive, does not shed tears……

and if any man begs to differ from your definition you call him pansy or effeminate
A man is someone who can be anyone and anything he wants to be.
At times when things go wrong it is already very tough for them (men)
don’t make it tougher by depriving them from their right to shed tears or express what they feel
and
toughest to fight the guilt of shedding tears later, only because you failed to understand their pain.

the only person who does not feel the pain is the dead
so the next time you say i don’t feel any pain because i am a man you better check if you are alive in the first place.

MEN∝WOMEN

images.png

Dear men who find it girly and women who find it attention seeking,

A feminist is “a person who believes in the advocacy of women’s rights on the ground of the equality of the sexes (Yes it’s FEMINISM), and tries to achieve equal opportunities and treatment for women”. It is not something that is referred only for women or something only women can become, it is an epicene or unisex concept just like your H&M hoodies, it will suit you too, at least try it once before you judge it for being too girly. It is something we need to work together for.
It is not for him or her it is for us.
This will help us achieve better definitions and something more than girly or manly,

When we will be classified only in two parts humane or inhumane,
Where there will be no pressure to act in a particular manner to be a part of gender race,
Where women and strength, and men and emotions won’t be ironical,

Where my hard work would determine my pay and not my gender,
Where my dominating nature would be determined by my genes and not my gender,
Where my body won’t signify softness, cowardice and naive,
Where women will have equal rights and opportunities as men
Where men will get equal credit and empathy as women,

Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake.

 

 

Who are you?

amrita-sher-gil-group-of-three-girls-1935-trivium-art-history.jpeg
Three girls by Amrita Sher-Gill

I was always told to check in the dictionary for meaning of words I never understood and therefore I did when I wanted to check what exactly a woman means;

“an adult human female” so why do people always keep saying that a woman is a person who makes sacrifices, who is simple, who is decent, who has no right to speak up or object, who is gullible, who needs to be protected, who is as resilient as water, who is not supposed to take decisions……….
to which I wonder is my dictionary wrong or am I on the wrong page?

To everyone who categorised us.

IMG-20180928-WA0034.jpg

You classified and segregated us in types like:

1 the obedient ones:
who no matter what, would never raise her voice against you, the gullible ones

2 the pampered ones:
the ones who expect the same kind of love from her in-laws like her parents

3 the spoilt ones:
the ones who love the self love stories, who love their mind, body, opinion before anyone else’s

4 the slutty ones
the ones who think they have the same freedom as boys do, the ones who are not stopped by night for anything they wanna do

5 the kind ones:
the ones who you can easily be convinced or forced to sacrifice anything even if it is their dream

6 the bizarre ones:
the ones who think age is just a number and who think aging is a concept just for the body not their heart or mind (I LOVE THEM THE MOST – THE TIMELESS BEAUTIES)

7 the pretty ones:
the fair, thin, classy, wears pink and does not apply make up, does not wear glasses ones

8 the intelligent ones:
the ones who can handle all the house work and still perform well in academics and excel at their hobbies too (WHO CARES)

9 the beauty with brains:
they’ re TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE

10 fake ones:
the ones who apply a lot of make up, the ones who think getting ready without occasions and being over dressed is just okay and a matter of their choice
.
.
.
.
but little did you know we weren’t old house scrap to be kept in boxes and wrapped .We were all books, while some had musical love stories in them, other had hardcore murder mysteries and you will never know when the OBEDIENT ONES would be done with the silent planning and start executing everything they planned these years, the PAMPERED ONES would accept the difference between parents and in-laws which you showed her and now she does not crave pampering from others, the SPOILT ONES would fall in love again with their own self and this time it will be stronger and forever, SLUTTY ONES would list down all weakness of these patriarchs while she hangouts with them, KIND ONES would again sacrifice but this time it will be with their consent and for them for the first time, BIZARRE ONES would use all their experience they got while aging, the PRETTY ONES whom you made to wear pink in order to be a girl would change their colour to red just like blood, INTELLIGENT ONES would collect all the tools like protractors and knives which she used while excelling at studies and housework and find another hobby this time which they won’t give up for you, BEAUTY WITH BRAIN ONES will show you they come for real and the FAKE ONES would start applying make up but this time not for a class or party but your funeral and then finally they come together to return you all the hatred coated in love which you gave her when she didn’t say a word.

 

–  Even in my most silent days I am a disaster about to occur

Dear Nani

The care of a mother
and understanding of a friend
the one who overlooks my flaws and calls them perfection
the one who tells me stories no novels did
the one who held me tight when no one did
the one who taught me how to live for others
the one who protected me like nobody else did
the one who taught me how kitchen can be used to cook love and care
the one who blamed herself for all my mistakes
the one who made me believe in fairytales
the one who loved me more than she loved her daughter
the one who made me a lady
the one who was never partial
the one who accepted me the way I was and cherished it
the one who never made me feel small
the one who showed me how the biggest and strongest thing on earth was her heart
the one whose body had more compassion than blood or cells
the one who was soft as dandelion but in moments of need fierce as fire
the one who is a perfect epitome of balance and modesty
the one who never complained
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

the one about whom even after writing pages and pages I will never get enough

The kind of things i tried finding in everyone but even god couldn’t match her kind of love

 

-Your Mini